My idea of a perfect first date:
I am sitting with my date, a gorgeous girl, in a roof top resturant with Champagne sparkling on the table and Stars in the sky. A melodious light music is going on in background and we are staring at each other. There is absolutely no one around and the music is shinning on the dull background of silience.
She seems to be very impressed with my sense of humor. My talks are fueling her giggles. My ideas are bringing her closer to me and her heart fall for me. My innocence, candidness and creativity is hypnotizing her. And her smile inspiring me.
She leans towards me. Her lips are just a centimeter away from my face. Her left hand is sensing the silkiness of my hair, her right hand is feeling the softness of my left palm. She is coming closer to my face and i fart. Suddenly the music becomes inaudible and the sound of my fart is reverberating throughout the city. The ejection of the gas ejected out my vocabulary. My face is emitting thousands of wierd expressions one by one in no particular order. My immaculate control over my words, my gestures and my mind is robbed. The centimeter transforms into a mile. Her motive behind coming close is lost and her feelings are stolen. She rubbs my hand with her and sits back. The empty space in the universe seemed tinier than the one in my mind.
The lessons of my childhood became vivid. "Always apologise if you do something wrong". I pulled myself together and thought of saying the most used word in the world. Sorry. My one hand was holding the fork, the other touching the rim of the bottom of the champagne class and face facing the table. I borrowed some courage from God, looked up in slow motion, holded my breath, opened my mouth to utter the word and she farted.

When god gives, He gives limitless.
I asked for a date with solitude, He married me with her!